You know, a lot of people are pretty interested in Jennifer Lopez’s plunging red gown, which she wore to a pre-Grammys party. Not just a party, but a gala, celebrating one of those people that such things celebrate.

We know people want to know all about this gown. But we’re not going to cover it, you just won’t see anything about Jennifer Lopez and her plunge dress in the pages of Oblivioni Magazine.

Some years ago, starlets wore plunge gowns that plunged all the way to the navel and below, and in the back, the very top of what is at times called “sacral dimple” (or, sometimes, the “lower back cleavage”) was visible. There is a more common term for “strategic lower-back cutout” or “daring low-rise design”, which begins with a b and ends with a k, but we would never print a term like that.

There is some dispute as to whether this gown goes that far! As AIMÉE LUTKIN reports in Elle Magazine, J.Lo wore a “halter neckline that fell in draped cloth almost to her navel.” In Lutkin’s eyes, it’s a shocking gown for a more restrained era. But as  MAYA ERNEST reports in Harper’s Bazaar, “The barely-there silhouette showed off her toned torso from every angle, thanks to a halter neckline that plunged all the way to her navel, as well as an equally revealing cut in the back of the dress that ended just above her tailbone.” Ernst also reports that “the draping straps of her iridescent gown also offered a hint of side boob.” Vanessa Serna, in Page Six, hedges her bets and takes no position on the belly button question, reporting that Lopez’s outfit is “ab-baring,” but failing to confirm if the gown bares the upper abs (sans navel) or the lower abs (navel and all). According to fashion historian Emma McClendon, many ab-baring outfits are also navel-baring, but it’s not an absolute rule, and so Serna’s reportage must be frustratingly incomplete for those who wish to know the answers to questions like this.

But even if J.Lo’s gown bared both the navel and the “tailbone,” we still would not report on it. We know that it might get us clicks and whatnot. But it just doesn’t interest us.

We just don’t care. If you want to read about J.Lo’s gown and whether it reveals her tailbone, side boob or belly button, you’ll just have to go somewhere else.

^^^

Photograph by Kalyee Srithnam.